thejoyrider: FGO // final ascension art (Default)
𝓜𝓪𝓻𝓲𝓮 𝓐𝓷𝓽𝓸𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓮 ([personal profile] thejoyrider) wrote in [community profile] dagung2020-03-21 06:06 pm

texts from last full moon




(use texts from the website, change them up to fit the situation or write your own!)
cardtrick: (twenty six /)

1

[personal profile] cardtrick 2020-03-21 05:35 pm (UTC)(link)
wow!! nice job. i don't even have one.

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battlebound: (20)

steak / food fantasy

[personal profile] battlebound 2020-03-21 05:27 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but I don't know if that was a dream or not.

2. If you don't want me in your room then lock your door better.

3. We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".

4. [ text him! ]
synchroswim: (pic#13081372)

3

[personal profile] synchroswim 2020-03-21 08:41 pm (UTC)(link)
dude dont let my dreams be dreams! i could be a really good pirate and no one would expect me to be part eel!!

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cardtrick: (twenty one /)

trucy wright / ace attorney

[personal profile] cardtrick 2020-03-21 05:34 pm (UTC)(link)
1. we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler

2. i don't think we should have started that trash fire...

3. there are rocks in my bed. and dirt all over my face. do you know why?

4. [ text her! ]
stopfen: (Although it doesn't really matter…)

3

[personal profile] stopfen 2020-03-21 06:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Look at my vegetable plot.


You didn't even eat them

1/lol

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ok done

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yesdoubt: (Default)

Momo | IDOLiSH7

[personal profile] yesdoubt 2020-03-21 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape"

2. Just an FYI, tetherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever

3. Aw he's cute...not in a "I wanna rip his clothes off" way, more of a "put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet"

4. Make sure I look cute passed out on the couch.

5. [text him!]

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plasticasshole: (✦ you take your aim)

Connor | Detroit: Become Human | Merrow

[personal profile] plasticasshole 2020-03-21 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Of course I licked it.
2. I almost drowned someone last night singing to Knights of the Black Death...
3. I need a full moons partner. You don't know how hard it is to reliably find someone to sleep with when you're stuck in the middle of the ocean.
4. I didn't get to the water in time... can you bring a cart?
5. Text him!
petcromancer: (UMM)

Hector | Castlevania

[personal profile] petcromancer 2020-03-21 06:13 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!

2. I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious

3. Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog parents.
plasticasshole: (✦ i feel myself falling)

3

[personal profile] plasticasshole 2020-03-21 06:18 pm (UTC)(link)
That’s actually a very good idea, though.

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arturiarex: (7)

Saber (Arturia Pendragon) | Fate/Zero | Monster

[personal profile] arturiarex 2020-03-21 06:23 pm (UTC)(link)
1. He's either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.

2. People don't tend to mess with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face.

3. Why are you drunk at the library?

4. Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.

5. Text her.
Edited 2020-03-21 18:29 (UTC)
gilgamess: ([ SLUTTY EXPRESSION ])

1 wink wonk

[personal profile] gilgamess 2020-03-21 06:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Perhaps more experimentation is in order.

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joies: Commissioned art, do not take! (Set my soul on fire)

Persephone | Original | Dragon

[personal profile] joies 2020-03-21 06:24 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Be honest, is changing into a dragon in the middle of sex a mood killer? Some people are into that right?

2. All I remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed.

3. Proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked cart with his mouth hanging open because of the shirt I'm wearing.

4. And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair.

5. (Or text her!)
battlebound: (20)

4 lmao

[personal profile] battlebound 2020-03-21 06:32 pm (UTC)(link)
I told you, I wasn't naked!

[ His shorts were just hard to see through the tentacles. ]

yes good

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weiward: (pic#13635804)

wei wuxian | the untamed

[personal profile] weiward 2020-03-21 06:25 pm (UTC)(link)
1. As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?  

2. I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads. Don't tell me i'm not resourceful.

3. Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again.

4. I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me. 
 
5. text him!

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wylderrant: (8)

Iramaat | Original | Monster

[personal profile] wylderrant 2020-03-21 06:27 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me.

2. What day is it and did you see me today?

3. Im drinking an entire bottle of wine straight from the bottle at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?

4. MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally attained romance and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.

5. Text her.
petcromancer: (sunlight)

[personal profile] petcromancer 2020-03-21 09:12 pm (UTC)(link)
Honestly, if they got within biting range of a cartwheeling faun, it's their own fault. They had ample warning.

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futhark: (doofus)

Caster (Cú Chulainn) | Fate/Grand Order

[personal profile] futhark 2020-03-21 06:44 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good his fire resistances are.

2. I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against dragon in my house but here we are.

3. I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from the Full Moon than that battle in Wildes where we all nearly died.

4. Best idea ever: Giving fae a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. What could go wrong?

5. Wildcard
Edited 2020-03-21 18:45 (UTC)
stopfen: (and fly to heaven)

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[personal profile] stopfen 2020-03-21 06:49 pm (UTC)(link)
Is that why there's a drawing on my arm?

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stopfen: (Now sleep peacefully)

Mikasa Ackerman | Attack on Titan | Fae | ah yes time to shitpost

[personal profile] stopfen 2020-03-21 06:45 pm (UTC)(link)
1. repodl,sfrknrreoapd
2. I woke up with more money than I had when I went out. Do you know why?
3. The shell on my arm just flaked off. There's more shell under it. Is this a fae thing or should I go to the infirmary?
4. I think rabbits keep eating my plants. Or Trucy is. And I fell in another pit while looking. Why are there so many?
5. Text her
cardtrick: (six /)

2

[personal profile] cardtrick 2020-03-21 06:49 pm (UTC)(link)
oh, we performed my latest trick. it was a smash success!

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courtintrigue: (regardless of my personal interest)

Morrigan | Dragon Age | witch

[personal profile] courtintrigue 2020-03-21 06:46 pm (UTC)(link)
1. The only way you could ever pleasure me is to set yourself on fire and let me watch.

2. You just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.

3. That is the last time I carry you out of a forest.

4. Keep your passive aggressive animalistic tendencies to yourself.
wylderrant: (6)

3

[personal profile] wylderrant 2020-03-21 06:47 pm (UTC)(link)
Never say never, dear heart.

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curruid_coinchenn: (are heard cries for mercy)

Berserker (Cú Chulainn Alter) | Fate/Grand Order | Dragon

[personal profile] curruid_coinchenn 2020-03-21 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)
1. woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?

2. you kept calling me your small dog last night.

3. i feel like i have to sign a death waiver before i have sex with him...

4. i'm covered in bruises and scratches. i don't know whether they're from a fight or fucking. or both.

5. i have random bruises including down my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. i feel like you're to blame for some of this.

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enkidoh: https://mobile.twitter.com/dane_nk (♬)

Enkidu | FGO | Witch

[personal profile] enkidoh 2020-03-21 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.

2. I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!

3. We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way

4. I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious

5. wildcard!
stopfen: (that won't come back)

[personal profile] stopfen 2020-03-21 07:33 pm (UTC)(link)
You are precious. But I'm not a guy so

[But would faenap if drunk enough.]

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ua_duibhne: (o62)

diarmuid ua duibhne | fate/zero

[personal profile] ua_duibhne 2020-03-21 07:40 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? Monster Bonds.

2. Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the Coven. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!

3. I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.

4. No stitches, just drunken spells and will power.

5. text him!
enkidoh: (⊂◉‿◉つ)

[personal profile] enkidoh 2020-03-21 07:45 pm (UTC)(link)
alcoholic monster bonds?

i take it those are the bonds where you drink a lot of beer?

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spaghettimonster: (PHONE4)

Papyrus - Undertale - Turnskin, un: CoolSkeleton95

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2020-03-21 08:19 pm (UTC)(link)
1
RIDDLE ME THIS. WHY DID I WAKE UP NEXT TO A STUFFED SWORD FISH?

2
ALL I REMEMBER... IS THAT I WAS TRYING TO CALL MY WOLF PACK. BY HOWLING.

3
I KEEP SEEING RANDOM PIECES OF MY OUTFIT ALL AROUND TOWN.

4
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I CAN'T BE A WIZARD.

5
(Wildcard)
futhark: (see ya)

1

[personal profile] futhark 2020-03-21 08:29 pm (UTC)(link)
So you can learn fencing! That's the first step.

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kuroi_taiyo: (9)

Judar | Magi | Faun

[personal profile] kuroi_taiyo 2020-03-21 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
1. dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes

2. He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.

3. He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me

4. I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.

5. Text him!

enkidoh: https://mobile.twitter.com/lunapont (omg pie)

1

[personal profile] enkidoh 2020-03-21 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
how does one eat an ass?

have you chopped it off and served it to yourself?

is it normal for humans to eat one another's asses?

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synchroswim: (Default)

demyx | kingdom hearts | merrow

[personal profile] synchroswim 2020-03-21 08:34 pm (UTC)(link)

1. i'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.

2. i just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.

3. dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just took a bath here and their soap in phenomenal

4. you high fived me for banging that naga but lock me outta house bc i ate your pumpkin pie? priorities bro

5. [text him!]
Edited 2020-03-21 20:35 (UTC)
sing_for_me: (unbelievable)

Alex Benedetto | Gangsta. | Merrow

[personal profile] sing_for_me 2020-03-21 09:23 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Deal with it.

2. I just remembered something from last night. check your pockets.

3. Look, I need your help, not your judgment.

4. Yours was better

5. Not my fault they can't breathe under water

6. wildcard/text her!
futhark: made by <user name="swagu"> (59)

3

[personal profile] futhark 2020-03-21 09:24 pm (UTC)(link)
How am I supposed to not judge you when you ask me for that?

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judgementor: (005)

Red Wine | Food Fantasy

[personal profile] judgementor 2020-03-21 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
1. Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?

2. So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?

3. I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.

4. So you threw a sword at me last night.

5. text him?

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gunsmithed: (10)

Percy de Rolo | Critical Role

[personal profile] gunsmithed 2020-03-21 09:52 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I'm cuddly. Deal with it.

2. Do you ever look at your life and go "I'm too sober for this bullshit"?

3. We blew shit up too. With a cannon.

4. Awoke with 47 small metal ornaments in my bed and on surrounding floor. Explanation?

5. I find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but phylactery right.
cryptsleeper: (Default)

2

[personal profile] cryptsleeper 2020-03-21 09:55 pm (UTC)(link)
All the fucking time, but especially here.

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long_live_the_queen: (murder does not cure headaches)

Kaede | Elfen Lied | Monster

[personal profile] long_live_the_queen 2020-03-21 10:47 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I woke up with a basket stuck to my horns but at least I was back inside the house

2. i'm only apologizing for the shed feathers OR the bite marks, not both

3. look how was I supposed to know you were allergic to feather dust

4. I TOLD YOU MY CLAWS AREN'T RETRACTABLE

5. [Wildcard!]
escardos: (onze.)

[personal profile] escardos 2020-03-23 06:23 pm (UTC)(link)
the shed feathers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i dont mind the bite marks lol
darkcharge: (219)

Vanitas | Kingdom Hearts

[personal profile] darkcharge 2020-03-21 10:48 pm (UTC)(link)
1. You kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried.

2. You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".

3. The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.

4. I just want brownies and waffles and someone to kick in the face.

5. Text him...
spaghettimonster: arrt-jim-lad (I THE GREAT PONTIFICATOR)

2

[personal profile] spaghettimonster 2020-03-21 10:54 pm (UTC)(link)
HEY, A GOOD REVENGE FACE IS ESSENTIAL TO ANY REVENGE. HOW ELSE WILL YOUR FOES KNOW HOW THOROUGHLY THEY'VE BEEN DEFEATED???

BESIDES. I WASN'T JUST PRACTICING FACES. I WAS ALSO PRACTICING MONOLOGUES.

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whomthebelltolls: (Savior)

Lady Maria | Bluhburn

[personal profile] whomthebelltolls 2020-03-21 10:56 pm (UTC)(link)
1. I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step.

2. And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.

3. I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, noodles, and cuddling with my dog for now.

4. If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch then the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.

5. Text her!
gunsmithed: (04)

2

[personal profile] gunsmithed 2020-03-21 11:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I mean, it is impressive. As long as she wasn't terribly fond of the dress.

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