texts from last full moon

[thejoyrider]

♥

(use texts from the website, change them up to fit the situation or write your own!)

Comments

2

[spaghettimonster]

OKAY, I'LL ADMIT IT. THAT'S THE BEST ARGUMENT FOR SLEEP I'VE EVER HEARD.

BUT MAYBE THE ALCHEMY IS OPTIONAL.

[princessascended]

Well, it's kind of what I'm working on right now. Trying to come up with chocolate substitutes for turnskins.

I feel like that's an alchemy problem, anyway.

[spaghettimonster]

HMMMMM... YOU'RE PROBABLY RIGHT! THE ALCHEMY OF COOKING A BRAND NEW THING.

WELL, I GUESS THERE'S NOTHING TO IT! YOU SHOULD GET MORE SLEEP. AND MAKE SOME NOT-CHOCOLATE FOR US ALL TO ENJOY!!

BUT HOW BAD CAN IMITATION CHOCOLATE EXPLOSIONS BE?

[princessascended]

You'd be surprised.

Ever spill hot chocolate on yourself?

[spaghettimonster]

ONCE OR TWICE. I REMEMBER IT WAS STICKY... I HAD TO SCRUB EVERYTHING DOWN. AND TAKE A LONG SHOWER.

BUT IT WAS NOTHING ON SPAGHETTI EXPLOSIONS.

[princessascended]

Wait, you've made spaghetti explode?

I feel like I have to ask how this happened.

[spaghettimonster]

OH, YOU KNOW. HOW ANY COOKING EXPLOSION HAPPENS! YOU KEEP TURNING UP THE HEAT... POURING ON THE COOKING OIL... REALLY FILLING THE KITCHEN WITH YOUR PASSION!!

WE BURNED THE HOUSE DOWN.

[princessascended]

Wow. Um, okay, you've officially got me beat.

[And she's been doing alchemy as opposed to just cooking.]

How much oil did you use?

[spaghettimonster]

I'M NOT SURE... WE WEREN'T MEASURING. JUST POURING TIL THE FLAMES ROSE HIGH!!!

SO I THINK YOU HAVE ME BEAT. THE VICTOR IN THIS CONTEST... IS THE ONE WITH THE LEAST ARSON UNDER THEIR BELT.

[princessascended]

That sounds like literally the worst way to measure it I can think of. I'm almost impressed.

[This is how you know she hasn't met Undyne.]

So, uh... what happened to the people who were staying in that house? Was it your house?

[spaghettimonster]

[That is a dead giveaway. Once you meet Undyne, it's easier to imagine that this happened more than once.]

WE WERE IMPRESSIVELY INTO IT!!!

THANKFULLY, IT WAS HER HOUSE. SO SHE CRASHED ON MY COUCH THAT NIGHT.

AND IN THE INN AFTER THAT. UNTIL THE REPAIRS WERE DONE.

[princessascended]

Well at least she had a place to go.

Did you guys learn your lesson, at least?

[spaghettimonster]

HMMM. IF THE LESSON WAS, 'DON'T BURN THE HOUSE DOWN WITH COOKING ENERGY'...

NOPE! BUT IT'S OKAY. SHE'S TOO BUSY FOR COOKING ANYMORE... AND I LEARNED THAT LESSON FRO SOMEONE ELSE.

DOES COOKING ALCHEMY TAKE CAREFUL MEASURING ALL THE TIME??

[princessascended]

[That is frightening and she fears for the next house this person lives in. But clearly she isn't here so at least they're safe.]

Oh yeah. It's extremely specific. You put in too much or too little of something and who knows what might happen.

[Which isn't surprising since it's basically magic chemistry.]

[spaghettimonster]

[Thankfully, she lives in a huge stone castle now. Or did when he left the underground. Either way, it would take quite the fire to burn that thing down.]

WOW! I'M IMPRESSED. NO ARSON YET... DESPITE NEEDING TO BE SO CAREFUL? YOU SHOULD FEEL PROUD!

[princessascended]

To be fair, that's why I do most of my alchemy practice in the coven halls. And I haven't done all that much alchemy in general, really.

But thanks.