[Let other people have nice things every once in a while.]

You smell like dirt and sweat, so we're even. [This comes with a flashy grin, determinedly not moving away. He has no issue with personal space, and in fact has employed lesser means as an intimidation tactic in other, similarly petty scenarios.

Also, he doesn't know what 'wet dog' smells like, let alone much of anything about animals... even if the insulting context is transparent.] I'll just take a picture of yours. No big deal, c'mon. It'll take two seconds.